Finally, Getting Honest. A Few Confessions... Also, RSVP To My AMA Tomorrow

I'm done playing polite. Here's why you should be too!

I’ve had it!

Happy Monday!

I get it—it’s not a happy Monday for a lot of you. But there’s nothing you can do about 99% of the things going on in the world right now. So, if you need a break, read on!

First off, welcome to all my new subscribers from last week. Hi!!!!!

Quick intro: I’m Amanda Lauren, and I mostly write about interior design, lifestyle, and kids' stuff for Real Simple, Forbes, and Today’s Parent. While a lot of my references are rooted in these topics, my advice applies to everyone.

Follow me on Instagram, because I’m a thirst monster.

Important note for paid subscribers:
I’m hosting a Google Meet AMA tomorrow (January 21st) at 9:00 AM PST/noon EST! You can pitch me in person too. If you’re a paid member, fill out this form to receive a calendar invite. Not many people have signed up yet (I mean, I said I’d be honest here), and I’d love to see more of you there.

The second newsletter this week (for paid subscribers only) will feature a super-helpful checklist for anyone who’s ever wondered why their clients' quotes didn’t make it into an article. I’ll show you how to share answers that writers can easily integrate into their work—which is a must for building long-term relationships.

Where Did “Honesty Is the Best Policy” Go?

Remember the phrase “honesty is the best policy”? I don’t think we consider it enough. Personally, I’m done with polite lies. A few things have triggered (ugh, hate that word) a change of heart, and I think a lot of this applies to PR.

About six months ago, I was listening to a podcast of someone who I strongly disagree with 50% of the time. I won’t name names, but her words stuck with me. Without diving into specifics, the gist was this: when you lie to people for the sake of politeness and not hurting their feelings, you’re not doing them any favors. It’s actually not the right thing to do—although it’s often the easier thing to do.

Then this happened. At a Friendsgiving in November, I overheard a sort-of-famous podcaster (not a Dear Media girlie but a true crime girlie who probably has never used the term girlie) say, “I’m done making myself smaller for men.” Her husband laughed, but I got it. I wanted to tell her I felt the same way, but I had to wrangle my toddler before she wreaked cranberry sauce havoc.

I too am done making myself smaller for anyone.

Writing honestly in this Substack has been freeing. Moving forward, I want to carry more of that honesty into my work as well as on social media.

A Few Confessions…

Here are three things I feel strongly about that haven’t admitted publicly—until now:

Quartz countertops are not marble. Let’s stop pretending! Most of them look terrible, and you’re not fooling anyone. Sure, quartz is more durable for kids, but you could just seal your marble countertops properly and have a gorgeous kitchen. Make a better choice and don’t lie to yourself.

Non-toxic cribs are non-negotiable. If you’re not buying your kid a non-toxic crib (and you can find one for under $200, so don’t make this a money thing) that they’ll bite and sleep in, you’re putting your child at a disadvantage. Furniture chemicals are dangerous—what is wrong with you?

Wood tile is an abomination. It only looks decent if the grout lines are invisible, and most contractors don’t know how to achieve that. One day, we’ll mock wood tile like we do glass bricks from Miami circa 1992.

Authenticity Is the Best Policy

It’s no surprise that some of the most popular content creators thrive because they’re authentic. I’ve been studying two influencers since the holidays. I say study because I’ve been trying to figure out why they have such a strong following. They aren’t aspirational (what’s the opposite of aspirational?), they aren’t cute, and I have nothing in common with them except that we’re moms.

As someone incredibly vain, I wouldn’t even go to Target in what they wear on camera—but I can’t stop watching them. Why? Because they’re real. And your clients need to lean into that authenticity.

I don’t want to link to them because I’m embarrassed, but they cook disgusting processed food and plate it. They both have similar schtick. IYKYK…

Encourage your clients to share their stories, struggles, and opinions. If they hate café curtains, pitch that. If they think a certain style is underrated, turn it into a story. A generic list of someone’s fancy projects isn’t inspiring and those pitches don’t work.

TELL THE TRUTH AND PITCH ME A REAL STORY!

Stop thinking like a publicist and start thinking like a content creator. One of the reasons traditional media is declining is the lack of authentic stories. Social media is thriving because it’s raw and real.

To be clear, this has NOTHING to do with politics or misinformation.

If your client has strong opinions, your job is to amplify them.

If they think Mocha Mousse paint looks like toilet waste, SAY IT! It doesn’t matter that it’s Pantone’s Color of the Year. It’s ugly, and someone out there with a paintbrush and a can is about to wild and ruin an entire house. TELL THAT PAINTER THE TRUTH!!